beautiful disaster

I feel like I'm on the brink of something. It's just a hunch, but it's a something.

I got the scholarship!! I was sooo happy about it I told just about every single person I met about it. It's really amazing. I guess the thing is that even though I may have been deserving of it, there were tonnes of people applying for it who were just as deserving of it, and the fact that God chose to bless me with it reminds me once again that He's not out to get me, and He cares for me. Wowwww.

I got into Interact exco, too, which is pretty cool. I guess I should expect things to start getting busier. I think it's going to be pretty interesting; God has been teaching me so much through Interact. How to care for others and to be selfless and to reach out, and it's just the tip of the iceberg, really. I'm glad for the opportunities to contribute to the community that forced me to not think of myself. It really puts things into perspective.

I wonder what it'll be like when I'm 20 and I look back at all this. I think it'll sort of be like a connect-the-dots picture, where some dots are connected and this picture is being formed. It probably won't be completely formed when I'm 20, but at least it'll be better formed than how it is now. I wonder what I'll see then, and I wonder what I'll realise about myself now. God, take me wherever You want me to go.

jac was here with you 5/15/2005 07:04:00 pm

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My Destiny
Psalm 46 (NASB)
God is our refuge and strength,
A very present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change
And though the mountains slip into the heart of the sea;
Though its waters roar and foam,
Though the mountains quake at its swelling pride.

There is river whose streams make glad the city of God,
The holy dwelling places of the Most High.
God is in the midst of her, she will not be moved;
God will help her when morning dawns.
The nations made an uproar, the kingdoms tottered;
He raised His voice, the earth melted.
The Lord of hosts is with us;
The God of Jacob is our stronghold.

Come, behold the works of the Lord,
Who has wrought desolations in the earth.
He makes wars to cease to the end of the earth;
He breaks the bow and cuts the spear in two;
He burns the chariots with fire.
"Cease striving and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."
The Lord of hosts is with us;
The God of Jacob is our stronghold.