tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-56228652011-07-27T19:09:39.975+08:00jacnoreply@blogger.comBlogger2231100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-89067067170322204332007-02-07T15:53:00.000+08:002007-02-07T16:43:40.661+08:00

Today I joined my very first Singapore queue. While trying to figure out how to save even more money this week, I recalled seeing ads in Subway about 10 cent sandwishes. So yesterday I called up Zhen, who works near United Square. Me: Zhen, could you help me go down to Subway to check when they're selling their 10c sandwiches? Zhen: Are you sure they're selling them? Can I go down later? I'm

jacnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-811583030986038872007-01-24T18:10:00.000+08:002007-01-24T18:28:50.819+08:00

There are days at work when we (the four interns) are really productive, and there are days when noone seems to get anything, or want to get anything done. Today is one of these days. Evangeline's the exception; she's off having classes at NTU. She took half the day off. The other two are playing pool. I said I'd join them but at that point of time I had been working--well, trying to look like I

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-20284487427784239512007-01-24T17:52:00.000+08:002007-01-24T18:05:04.843+08:00

Gmail conversation between me and Zhen in the middle of designing a magazine cover (her) and sourcing out Israeli innovative technologies (me): me: i'm having an oreo Zhenhua: oo that reminds me I have cookies me: you do? where'd you get them from? Zhenhua: my mummy made me take them go to subway they're giving free ones me: WHAT??? REALLY??? WHY?? Zhenhua: you have 18 minutes more to get me:

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-81714791289616061902007-01-13T21:56:00.000+08:002007-01-13T22:29:19.728+08:00

Shopping at urbanoutfitters.com makes me so happy! I like seeing all the pretty dresses. I want to get Darrell to convince FJ Benjamin to bring in urbanoutfitters. Had a Yale alumni interview today. It was so funny; I'd been worrying about what to wear. Zhipeng (who got into Yale) advised me to wear something not so casual, but "something you wear to coffee bean", which was where we were

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1167375855073455862006-12-29T14:22:00.000+08:002006-12-29T15:04:15.090+08:00

Google is taking over the world! And soon it'll become one of those multinational conglomerates we all love to hate! Wait. I think it's one already. What's a conglomerate? It's such a windy, sunshiney day and I'm woozy and sickly. Not really sickly. I'm getting better. But my mum tricked me into taking medicine that would make me drowsy. I was supposed to start on my essays (again) but I'm too

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1166541623095827092006-12-19T23:09:00.000+08:002006-12-19T23:20:23.110+08:00

The rain was splattering itself on the windscreen as we drove through the storm and I went chattering on. If I had the A'levels to deal with, I would be silently brooding now. But I don't now. Dan was surprised I was being so, in his words, "relaxed". Because I had just found out that Yale requires me to take 3 SAT subject tests when I've only take 2, and a few days earlier I'd found out that

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1165847094226863922006-12-11T22:20:00.000+08:002006-12-11T22:24:54.236+08:00

Babies? o_O I wanna pretty baby when I grow up :) So Chang and Yado got it into their heads to make sure I went to a club at least once in my lifetime. I'm going to mambo at Zouk on Wednesday. Unbelievably, Mum said yes. Perks: free entry and I get to see Chang do the mambo. Plus, protective boyfriend to fend off drunk guys. Should be interesting. Quick updates: Working at Mum's

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1165135213423720502006-12-03T16:37:00.000+08:002006-12-03T16:40:14.496+08:00

This site + seeing Joel getting alternately fascinated and flustered by a cat last night makes me want to have babies. Until I remember I'm eighteen years old and shrink from even the thought of pain. Haha. So let's KIV that. I was supposed to be working on my uni applications but I did that yesterday and I'm really sleepy from the bad night's sleep so I went on mr brown's site, got to mr miyagi

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1164804874583500582006-11-29T20:46:00.000+08:002006-11-29T20:54:34.960+08:00

I couldn't sleep the night before my last paper; ended up having 5 hours of sleep and now it's 8:45 pm, I've been out since 8 am (and am still out at my mum's office, waiting for her to be done with her work) and I'm dead like a dog. Not really, but I've been pretty sedated today because of my lack of sleep. So A's ended but I don't feel any exhilaration at all. Weird. The next few days are

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1164015760063509132006-11-20T17:38:00.000+08:002006-11-20T17:42:40.080+08:00

Okay, things are going to look up. I keep telling myself that after every paper. It's a bit like when I was running 5 k with Zaneta during Dorcas' birthday and we were counting the white markings on the track--1200m...1100m...1000m...--and you keep your mind focused on that because the next marking will pop up soon enough, just you wait and see, and soon you'll be down to the just 100m and you'll

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1163587770902863972006-11-15T18:31:00.000+08:002006-11-16T14:09:35.103+08:00

9 down, 5 to go! The worst is over...I think. Two weeks more and I'll be free :) Up for grabs after A's: Jac needs more space to store all the new books and clothes she's going to buy after A'levels, so she's giving away her A'level books/notes. Contact her if you're interested! (ps: they're free) Early Bird Specials 1 math TYS (1995-2005) 1 set of European history notes (I doubt anyone wants

jacnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1162268706563789162006-10-31T12:16:00.000+08:002006-10-31T12:25:06.576+08:00

Thank you, Limewire/YouTube/iTunes, for convincing record companies that free music is a great promotional tool. I think I just got myself John Mayer's newest CD Continuum for free from msn.com. With all the songs, not edited or cut or sampled! I couldn't believe my ears. Don't really like his new look though. The dark locks and chiselled cheekbones, coupled with creepy stare remind me too much

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1162218303530335532006-10-30T21:38:00.000+08:002006-10-30T22:25:04.900+08:00

So I'm at Commonapp.org and I'm in the midst of checking every single itty bitty detail before I submit my application for the Emory Scholars Program (Deadline: 1 Nov). So far everything's in order, I've got all my essays copied and pasted, and all the millions of little checkboxes checked (Yes, my parents are married, I stay with both, I need financial aid, I'm not on early decision...) and then

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1161527694216992732006-10-22T22:31:00.000+08:002006-10-23T01:24:23.280+08:00

Once in awhile, when it's good It'll feel like it should And they're all still around And you're still safe and sound And you don't miss a thing Till you cry when you're driving away in the dark Singing Stop this train I want to get off And go home again I can't take the speed it's moving in I know I can't Cause now I see I will never stop this train John Mayer, Stop This Train The thing I

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1160635843177709892006-10-12T14:32:00.000+08:002006-10-12T14:50:43.190+08:00

Taking a breather after a whole morning of struggling with stats. Ironic that the most boring part of my A'level syllabus comes from my best subject. There was this horrible headache that just kept on throbbing while I tried to work out the sums, and that's a sign of my feeling rushed and not trusting enough. So after I was done with math I decided to take a break before starting on history. Have

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1160465500812031032006-10-10T15:25:00.000+08:002006-10-10T15:33:48.170+08:00

Guess what. Guess I'm tired again. It's not without reason. It's frustrating, really. I wish I didn't have to study so much--no, it's not the studying that's the problem, it's everything else. What's with all these scholarship applications? Do I have to do them now? Only because you're afraid of losing out--didn't you decide you'd do them later, after the A's? Should I do them now? I want to slow

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1153925692937464152006-09-22T11:49:00.000+08:002006-09-22T12:02:51.383+08:00

Saturday at about noon at Fu Lu Shou complex, where I used to have econs tuition, the sun streams in from the window, its rays hot and dense. The street beneath us bustles with sounds of the market and people going on their morning marketing, and crackling sounds of a radio voice speaking in Cantonese. Fu Lu Shou complex itself is an old, Chinese-style building that has shops that sell medicinal

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1157699783385664012006-09-08T14:59:00.000+08:002006-09-08T15:16:23.396+08:00

Logged on at 2:20, telling myself that I really had to start work soon so I should get off at 2:30. Then I start listening to Jack Johnson and Goo Goo Dolls and blog-hopping and suddenly it's nearly 3 and I realise I was supposed to get off half an hour ago and if I keep on going I'm never going to find out how Singapore got her independence! I want out. :P Jac pouts her monkey face. (Dan's

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1157344631175764842006-09-04T12:09:00.000+08:002006-09-04T20:30:20.870+08:00

Meeting David Marshall In 1994 Many years ago, I made a promise to David Marshall, the first Chief Minister of Singapore and one of Singapore's finest legal minds. The promise was to publish in full an interview, which I had with him on 5 May 1994 at the offices of Singapore law firm, Drew & Napier. Today, about 12 years after the interview and as Singaporeans celebrate 41 years of

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1157341529937794342006-09-04T11:43:00.000+08:002006-09-04T12:58:07.776+08:00

Hossan Leong in Parliament You cannot leave without watching this--it's hilarious. I think humour is a sign of a healthy nation. More from Mr Brown: Last Protest Island

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1157162366549824302006-09-02T09:43:00.000+08:002006-09-02T09:59:26.560+08:00

Okay, breathe Jac, breathe! I can feel the oxygen slowly seeping out of my brain--if oxygen does get to your brain (it does right? Through the blood cells--haemoglobin, yeah, that's right. Bio lessons haven't failed me yet). It's gonna be okay. Let me just ASK. How on EARTH does someone handle studying for her prelims and A's while having to choose courses (not just schools, courses! Politics,

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1155716292749852412006-08-16T16:11:00.000+08:002006-08-16T16:18:12.760+08:00

Three months to the end? It's exciting, thinking of what I'm going to do in the next phase of my life. Get to start all over again and I don't know why, that always appeals to me. Maybe because I make too many mistakes if I'm stuck in the same place for too long. Who knows? Maybe my university life will turn out as unsatisfying as JC was (I'm hoping not). I remember I felt the same sort of

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1153402761893061592006-07-20T21:27:00.000+08:002006-07-20T21:47:04.836+08:00

So the S Lit question goes: Are Shakespeare's tragedies the result of the tragic heroes and heroines' own self-destruction or are they the result of situations beyond the characters' control? My conclusion is both, and my mind wanders to contemplate the possibility of my brother having self-destructive tendencies of Shakespearean-tragedy proportions--his life sure seems like Hamlet's right now.

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1152710812586696112006-07-12T21:08:00.000+08:002006-07-12T21:26:52.650+08:00

Singapore Idol's lost its kick. I wish it had better singers. Joakim is so cute but he'd be better eye-candy if he could actually sing well :( I mean, he sings adequately but not well. Mathilda on the other hand is wow. Can't see a winner yet but then again, no one really suspected Taufik would win till the last few rounds. I'm sorry I'm so unglam--yes, I do watch Singapore Idol, if not regularly

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1151662106762334982006-06-30T18:01:00.000+08:002006-07-05T19:06:29.640+08:00

1. I kan speke Chaucerian. I am effectively trilingual. 2. They've gone electronic with the exam timetables so I don't have a hard copy where I can cross out the exams I've just taken with a big fat permanent black marker. They're killing all the fun. 3. If you go to Billy Bomber's and happen to order the milkshake, make sure you're sharing it with someone else; it's enough for two. And make sure

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1150865039541677282006-06-21T12:36:00.000+08:002006-06-21T12:43:59.580+08:00

No one ever accused me of being a procrastinator. Anyway, the boyfriend's birthday is in a month's time and I need present ideas so I can knock his socks off with my brilliance and ingenuity. Something cheap, something kooky and preferably not mushy or whatever. The good thing is that I don't think he reads my blog because I'm already way too lor sor and depressing in real life so just post your

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1150790711331715792006-06-20T15:57:00.000+08:002006-06-20T16:05:11.343+08:00

It feels so deliciously naughty to break out from the structure. On Sunday I watched Garden State and since then I've been prowling the net in search of anything remotely Garden State-related. Let Go is the most lovely piece of music I have heard, and it has become my ringtone. My homework has been relegated to "another day", when I'm feeling better and more studious. Ahhh...how nice life is when

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1150425259185899132006-06-16T10:26:00.000+08:002006-06-16T10:34:21.980+08:00

So it rained today, putting to rest all my plans for a run. So I went online today, and checked out my future, and swallowed down the fear I felt, looking right through it as if it had never been there. Just that it was, and it is, and the fear I have of failure will never really go away, it seems, unless I take hold of something and let myself hang freely, trusting that if I fall I will land in

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1149820038450924472006-06-09T10:21:00.000+08:002006-06-09T10:27:18.450+08:00

Maybe it's a sign that I should change my blogskin. It's raininggggg! :P I had this grand plan to wake up at 7:30 and go running but the rain came and destroyed everything. And I'm really supposed to be studying (as usual) but as usual I'm not. Yesterday I got fed up with my boredom and decided to go out to study. Ended up in Zhen's place, which is not the most exciting study place but is rather

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1149656586090237772006-06-07T12:35:00.000+08:002006-06-07T13:03:37.770+08:00

Ahhh! I have 10 pages of size 8 print about Malaya during the Occupation to make notes on and I spent the last 1 hour doing 2 pages! This is CRAZY! This is the paradox of Jac the (according to practically everyone) insane mugger-tode-nerd: She hates studying (especially econs) but likes knowing tonnes and tonnes of incredibly useless bits of information like truffles are a chocolate and a

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1148616793568930732006-05-26T12:06:00.000+08:002006-05-27T09:50:34.690+08:00

So I went online today, fully intending to look up Philip Larkin and try to improve my poetry reading skills since, according to Burge, they suck. Ended up, however, checking my mail, replying to stray, previously-consigned-to-the-inbox-forever frends' emails, and checking out urbanoutfitters' sales items again. I never buy these things, I just look and look and look and waste time but hey, it

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1147415705702000952006-05-12T14:18:00.000+08:002006-05-12T14:35:05.743+08:00

Legs can't move. This is the fifth straight day I've had dance and Ailene made us do the ballet item 4 times in a row today! Okay, so I cheated and didn't do the pirouttes properly, but it was still super tiring cos before that we'd done Zhi's dance like 7 times in a row! And tomorrow there's practice again. Getting pretty sick of Zhi's dance even though it's really really nice to dance in (not

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1146417346755798172006-05-01T00:56:00.000+08:002006-05-01T01:15:46.830+08:00

Can't sleep again. It's been a while since the last one. Glad tomorrow's a holiday. Just checked my mail, went through Interact stuff so I won't have to do them tomorrow. Planning on getting up early to run because I haven't been able to lately and have been feeling horrible as a result. It's come to a point where it's not just about maintaining my weight or whatever--when I don't run I actually

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1146052708705783232006-04-26T19:28:00.000+08:002006-04-26T19:58:28.783+08:00

What a crazy day. Okay, have to backtrack and explain everything, but for once in my JC life, the past few weeks have been busy, and I've enjoyed it, despite everything. Today was an anticlimax, though, and I went through quite a gamut of emotions to get to this moment. Over the past few weeks I've been in charge of organising a spectacles collection in Clementi for the HC Interact Club. We were

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1145633312860883782006-04-21T23:25:00.000+08:002006-04-21T23:28:32.870+08:00

1. What do You want me to study? 2. What do You want me to do? 3. Where do You want me to go? How am I supposed to proceed? All my dreams and hopes in the end just seem like pipe dreams, and I can't possibly imagine living and studying somewhere other than in Singapore for the next few years. How do I detach myself from what seems to be good in this life to find what is truly good and pleasing to

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1144480724539374142006-04-08T15:08:00.000+08:002006-04-08T15:18:44.563+08:00

Have suddenly found myself in the midst of activity and although I quite like it things have come to the point where they clash with each other and I'm going to have to make decisions, and these decisions are not going to make everyone happy. It's highly reminiscent of sec 4, when my embittered self barrelled her way through to what she wanted without caring about what other people thought,

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1143108748759885862006-03-23T18:06:00.000+08:002006-03-23T18:12:28.773+08:00

Word for the day: fait accompli. "An accomplished, presumably irreversable deed or fact." As in, "Here every delay in the beginning of war operations is regarded as signifying the dancer that foreign powers might interfere. We are urgently advised to proceed without delay and to place before the world a fait accompli."--Austro-Hungarian Ambassador for Berlin, Szogyeny, July 1914. 5 essays in two

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1142919197307386762006-03-21T13:08:00.000+08:002006-03-21T13:33:17.350+08:00

Sorry, the blog's been a bit dead, hasn't it? You're probably used to it, though :) Taking a (long long long) break from doing econs. I think all the studying I did last week burnt me out so the fact that I have my econs block test tomorrow is not enough to scare me into studying just yet. It's been an interesting few days. Finally got the badly-kept secret out of the horse's mouth--not that I

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1140690474820854502006-02-23T18:03:00.000+08:002006-02-23T18:27:54.863+08:00

I have discovered what to write when they send you those memes and ask you, "If you could relive your life, what is the one thing you would do?" My answer: LEARN HOW TO ICE SKATE! The only thing that has come out of my being sick this week is a renewed fascination for the art of ice dance. I wish I could dance the samba or the cha-cha on ice! How do you do that without falling off your skates? (

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1139838210100109572006-02-13T21:01:00.000+08:002006-02-15T18:22:43.116+08:00

I'm thankful that God doesn't ask us to do what we cannot do in this life. There comes a point when you're studying humanities when you realise that some things simply cannot be acquired, regardless of how much mugging you do. There is no conscious action you can carry out to make your prose more lucid, or to acquire a nimble, analytical mind that thinks fast and writes even faster. Sure, you

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1139111887692505682006-02-05T11:54:00.000+08:002006-02-05T11:58:59.543+08:00

Darn it, I typed out this looong entry and at the push of a button discovered that 'the blog you were searching for could not be found' (what on earth does that mean?) and my entry was gone, fragmented into little itty bytes, lost forever. So, because I am too lazy and am craving for another love letter, I'll give you the gist of the entry, which was essentially the last paragraph: Intelligent

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1137404323417369062006-01-16T17:26:00.000+08:002006-01-16T17:38:43.436+08:00

My crazy printer's played me out again. Instead of getting a nice 3-sheet essay, I get a horribly disordered 4-sheet one because the printer printed the wrong things on the wrong side of the paper (it really wasn't my fault!). Oh well, at least I saved ink. It's just not very nicely ordered, which is annoying, but something I can live with. And the words are tinted green because my printer's

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1136186933629672762006-01-02T14:15:00.000+08:002006-01-02T15:28:53.686+08:00

Once in a while when something momentuous happens you feel as if you're at the threshold of something, and things are about to change. With the onset of the new year, I've been having that feeling pretty often. It's this tension of anticipation and apprehension. It's been 2005 for 365 days already and everyone's pretty sick of it, but with the new year comes new changes, new challenges, and as

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1135995203070869772005-12-31T09:46:00.000+08:002005-12-31T10:13:23.083+08:00

Was: US $28 Now: US $9.90 I know I've got a pair like this already but these are so pretty and such a bargain! More pretty pairs: But let us not look at the price tag. My mum's not gonna let me pay $60 for this, even though it's sooo nice: Isn't this the cutest case you've ever seen?:) Pretty... Am tempted to browse through the 'Pretty Little Things' section but I know that will keep me

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1135822933536807372005-12-29T09:50:00.000+08:002005-12-29T10:22:13.623+08:00

Am sitting in my living room eating a microwaved mince pie for breakfast and listening to my brother's punk rock songs as he plays on the computer. I'm pretty sure he only plays those songs because I can't sing along to them and annoy him. Although, he's played them so frequently that even if I don't know the lyrics, I can hum along to the more tolerable ones. I think last night one of them

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1135685112080462402005-12-27T19:52:00.000+08:002005-12-27T21:28:31.246+08:00

I'm sorry Electrico, my brother took your CD which I borrowed from Dan and went and ripped it, so now it's going to be permanently stuck in our computer. I might buy it if it grows on me though. I think the prospect of not shopping when I know there are post-Christmas sales going on is good motivation for me to finish up my holiday homework. I vowed not to buy anything until I completed my

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1135606566309631992005-12-26T22:11:00.000+08:002005-12-26T22:16:06.320+08:00

It occurs to me that no movie, book, or poem can encapsulate life as richly as life itself. Every trial and joy moulds us and our perspectives towards ourselves and others--each situation we are placed in pushes us ever more gently towards what we will eventually become. No amount of literature can impact you as greatly as your life. Thank You, Father Storyteller, for my life :)

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1135259219342073582005-12-22T21:26:00.000+08:002005-12-22T21:46:59.376+08:00

We tumble onto the plush red seats, all six of us. It is rare for us to actually have a free afternoon together, and once we have it, we do not know what to do with it. Adora and I order lunch, and I easily persuade Nic to share my ice cream. We sit, silent, because we have nothing in common anymore except the past. "Say something," I nudge Nic. "Hmpf!" she goes in her comical Nic way. "You know

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1135157827223562582005-12-21T17:33:00.000+08:002005-12-21T17:42:02.290+08:00

The world's spinning by too quickly for me to get hold of what's happening. Holidays are ending, things are confusing, and I wish I knew how I were feeling but I don't. Going to watch the Nutcracker with Debbie later today. Quite looking forward to it. I thought I wouldn't be going because I'd be in Malaysia but things have worked out quite nicely. Quite. Have been procrastinating about my

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1134619272439224132005-12-15T11:49:00.000+08:002005-12-15T12:01:12.450+08:00

I find that my moods meander me through different personalities as the days wear on. You're never really one person, because you're never really in the same place all the time, and places and people make you repond differently. I am the girl above the commotion, always floating, always elusive, never needing people. And yet I am also constantly falling, excruciatingly open, unfailingly eager to

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1134525999096677392005-12-14T10:04:00.000+08:002005-12-14T10:07:50.503+08:00

Falling asleep to the sound of silence. Have been sleeping well.

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1133473430002954902005-12-02T05:05:00.000+08:002005-12-02T05:45:23.603+08:00

It was only at 4 am on the morning of the day before my SAT that I began to panic about my essay. Previously, I had dismissed any worries about it because hey, I've spent a whole year writing GP essays, so it should be no sweat right? My cold reason then pointed out to me that my tutors are so lazy, I've only written about 4 GP essays the whole year, 3 of which were under test conditions. And I

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1132517193587362582005-11-21T03:40:00.000+08:002005-11-21T04:06:33.650+08:00

It's 3:40 am on a Monday morning and I am unable to sleep again. I tried, y'know, closing my eyes and not thinking but it doesn't really work, and I'm supposed to go to the library tomorrow to research for my history essay and after that watch Harry Potter with Debbie and Justin, so I'd really like a good night's sleep, but I don't think I could get one if I tried so here I am, not trying. It's

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1132034375858606372005-11-15T13:45:00.000+08:002005-11-15T17:18:45.510+08:00

I am sick. Runny nose and a cough that seems to bring up all my insides with it. Don't worry, it's getting better--the cough, I mean. The nose just keeps on leaking and leaking and killing more trees for tissue. It's better than yesterday, when I ate the medicine and stumbled around the place as if I were on hallucinogens or something. The worst part was that when I tried to get to sleep I

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1131557811302182202005-11-10T01:19:00.000+08:002005-11-10T01:36:51.346+08:00

Lying in my bed in the darkness for two hours, I wondered and wondered, and thought of many things--random and floating, sweet and memorable. Then I thought of other, more random things, and wondered what people without journals did when they thought of things like these, inconsequential, out-of-the-blue thoughts that just needed to be expressed, like, "What if I become an air stewardess, and

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1131505635183307212005-11-09T10:52:00.000+08:002005-11-09T11:07:15.206+08:00

It's subsided into a dull ache now. No more searing pain, just an ache, but an ache tells you what you're missing, and an ache reminds you that things could be better and you could be happier. It's in the silence that I notice the ache. It was always there but in the silence everything is stripped away and what is really inside you reveals itself. In the quietness of the day, all alone, I ache.

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1130991285579290362005-11-03T12:13:00.000+08:002005-11-03T12:14:45.596+08:00

I have decided to rest over the holidays. :)

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1130748634218755682005-10-31T16:35:00.000+08:002005-10-31T16:50:34.263+08:00

So the MOE attachment fell through. Not that I'm devastated--I'm disappointed purely for pragmatic and selfish reasons, because there goes another little sentence on my very brief CV--I'm glad because it gives me more time to rest this holiday. Books, essays, salsa and friends, here I come! I wonder where I'll go, and I wonder how far I'll get, with this pathetic CV (it is pathetic because after

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1130396299964696832005-10-27T14:37:00.000+08:002005-10-27T14:59:57.300+08:00

I always thought ignoring problems wasn't the solution but maybe sometimes they are when the problems are irrational feelings and worries. It's when I try to analyse them and dwell on them that I get even more depressed and worried, and it comes back to me that "You will keep in perfect peace he whose mind is stayed on You" (Isaiah 26:3; a mixture of the NIV and KJV versions), not on my problems.

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1129390514120483482005-10-15T22:47:00.000+08:002005-10-17T17:20:36.436+08:00

Zhen: I know I was supposed to do this ages ago but I forgot and since I have time now (well, sorta), I'll just do it. 20 Random Things About Myself. 1. I used to have a dog, but she ran away from us and we didn't look for her because the next few days it rained and she was old anyway. (I sound so heartless) She was actually my uncle's dog, just that his apartment didn't allow pets, and after he

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1128921979028380462005-10-10T13:04:00.000+08:002005-10-14T16:46:51.716+08:00

Today I am at home, clattering at the keyboard, listening with one ear to Heavier Things and John Mayer's mellow, soothing tones, and with the other ear vaguely tracing the tinkling on my neighbour's piano next door. Today I have finished a novel, planned for cell on Friday and am walking around with pedicure toe-dividers in order to stop my bunions from growing bigger, admiring my pretty plum

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1128317989417430442005-10-03T13:17:00.000+08:002005-10-03T13:39:49.533+08:00

I feel so fidgety--Ahh! I think it was the adrenaline from econs exam, but it worked the wrong way. It's supposed to make you concentrate better. It made me want to get out of the room and run screaming down the hallway at the prospect of no more econs for the rest of the year! The first I did, half an hour before the stipulated ending time, and the second I refrained from doing with difficulty.

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1127972589519789252005-09-29T13:28:00.000+08:002005-09-29T13:43:09.526+08:00

I guess it's a good thing, in a warped way. I'm back to the days when my blog was just another collection of bytes floating around in cyberspace, obscured by the more important, bigger collections of bytes. Back then things came out of me a lot more freely. Now...I seem to have a permanent sore throat and a chronic loss of memory. Speaking of memory, I have just woken up to the reality that for

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1127551100218363122005-09-24T16:37:00.000+08:002005-09-24T16:38:20.230+08:00

And just in case we were all wallowing in self-pity over the past week (I know I was), take a look at today's Home section of the Straits Times and the front page of Today. Sure puts things into perspective.

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1127463893462874752005-09-23T16:07:00.000+08:002005-09-23T16:24:54.726+08:00

I think I've become more vulgar as a result of hanging around the people in class so much. Uggh. If only their brilliance would rub off on me in a similar way. Was floating through cyberspace reading hc people's blogs. Bernie's entries never fail to amuse me, albeit in a very vulgar and gross way. It's a change, though--even though it's school we're all complaining about, the people in Hwa Chong

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1126362777521902082005-09-10T22:04:00.001+08:002005-09-10T22:32:57.523+08:00

Just came back from YMLC and surprisingly am not shacked even though it's 10 pm at night and I slept at 4:30 am this morning after two completely idiotic games of bluff with the Barker people. I was falling asleep throughout the day, though, and I nearly didn't make it down in time for breakfast. All in all, I'm thankful for the three days of rest I had in JB. It wasn't rest per se, what with

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1125935435416765992005-09-05T23:33:00.000+08:002005-09-05T23:50:35.423+08:00

So I finally got myself a skirt yesterday, after much whining to anyyone who would listen on Saturday that I don't look good in skirts, but I'm sick of wearing pants, and I can't find the perfect skirt because I look like a hooker in those short silky skirts that are now in fashion. (DON'T LAUGH.) So after bringing my sartorial woes to Kim and laying them squarely on her Orchard-Road-savvy

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1125759516212143282005-09-03T22:33:00.000+08:002005-09-03T22:58:38.056+08:00

Went to watch Betrayal with the class and had an interesting talk with Brandon on the way home, about the play (which he thought was utter rubbish), class dynamics, and friendships. I quite enjoy talking to guys--in many aspects, they are more open than girls about their lives and their opinions. Of course, you have to pick the right guys to talk to. And after 9 months with the class, I think

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1125573642813056472005-09-01T19:16:00.000+08:002005-09-01T19:20:42.813+08:00

It's funny--I just realised that every time I conquer one fear, another fear jumps out at me and it's back to square one again. And a lot of times it's more the prospect of what is going to happen that scares me and not the issue itself. But I think that's the whole point, isn't it? If we get everything into perspective there isn't anything to fear, but a lot of times we're hanging upside down

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1123680783399519522005-08-10T21:06:00.000+08:002005-08-10T21:33:05.046+08:00

Grace. There's a lot to learn about it. Don't know if anyone visits this thing anymore but here's what I think God has to say about it. We're all familiar with the struggle to live up to God's standards, and the irony that we know we can never ultimately attain them this side of heaven. And that's discouraging. Why strive for something you know you cannot achieve? For every time we obey God

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1122379014026235432005-07-26T19:36:00.000+08:002005-07-26T19:56:54.033+08:00

It's been almost a month since I wrote...well, not quite. I'm feeling sort of sleepy--so what's new?--and it's dark and I feel sort of peaceful yet not quite. It's been such a long do-nothing day, and I've felt so unproductive even though I know I have been doing things. It rained a whole lot today. I woke up to the smell of rain and felt happy because it meant I could sleep some more and get to

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1121092305099530682005-07-11T22:25:00.000+08:002005-07-11T22:31:45.106+08:00

So after running through everything in my head and falling back in despair, knowing that I'm so steeped in sin that I can't do a thing to save myself and have to rely on God's grace, I ask Him what makes a perfect Christian. What kind of person does He want? The answer comes back to me the same way it has hundreds of times before, yet it strikes me again as remarkably simple yet intrinsically

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1119707538286132042005-06-25T21:13:00.000+08:002005-06-25T21:52:19.396+08:00

I came to a powerful realisation today. It's amazing how things can just waltz by you and you can see what's happening without truly realising what it all means. Today was one of those days when everything came clear and I had to run back to God again. You see, June's been my dance month. Last September, I felt God calling me back to dance and I started taking ballet classes again. This June

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1118731506303600912005-06-14T14:31:00.000+08:002005-06-14T14:45:06.313+08:00

Haven't been blogging much. There isn't very much to say, and when there is, I don't quite know how to say it. For the past few days I've sort of been sitting around watching. It feels that way, at least. I feel like the little mouse in a corner who just sits and watches the rest of the world go by and wonders why people are the way they are. (Maybe it's the afternoon heat that's making me feel

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1117768243606212102005-06-03T10:49:00.000+08:002005-06-03T11:10:43.613+08:00

A week of holidays has chugged slowly by and I feel like I've been on holiday forever. It's strange, I guess. You would think I'd have every reason to feel happy but I don't. Having holidays gives me more time to enjoy myself but so far I haven't been feeling that way. I've been going out with my friends and having time to dance and spend time with my family but the thing is that it's always

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1117254930692066732005-05-28T12:26:00.000+08:002005-05-28T12:35:30.696+08:00

When I grow up, I want to be the ad designer for Salvatore Ferragamo. Have you seen their ads? I just spotted one in today's paper (World section, you can go and have a good look at it). A quarter of a page, all white, except the Ferragamo logo on top, 'SALE' in size 20 capitals right in the centre and 'PARAGON, #01-38', 'ISETAN SCOTTS, LEVEL 1', & 'TAKASHIMAYA D.S., LEVEL 2'. Ohmigosh! What a

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1116934699553911102005-05-24T19:31:00.000+08:002005-05-24T19:44:44.773+08:00

When I grow up I want to be: 1. Married. 2. Happy. 3. Skinny. At least, not fat. (but 2 can override 1 if marrying doesn't make me happy. So in effect there's only one thing I want to be, and that is unfortunately rather hard to obtain.) I am a surprisingly low-maintenance, unambitious kid.

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1116932830494415312005-05-24T18:54:00.000+08:002005-05-24T19:14:48.996+08:00

...I have to plagiarise Jars of Clay. It was the fear of God that led me to You And it's the fear of You that takes getting used to I've never been one to hang my heart on a thread But You spun me around and You loved me instead I know I could turn to something other than You 'Cause I don't understand You and why You're after me I've never been the saint You wanted me to turn to And I

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1116155467559715292005-05-15T19:04:00.000+08:002005-05-15T19:21:12.390+08:00

I feel like I'm on the brink of something. It's just a hunch, but it's a something. I got the scholarship!! I was sooo happy about it I told just about every single person I met about it. It's really amazing. I guess the thing is that even though I may have been deserving of it, there were tonnes of people applying for it who were just as deserving of it, and the fact that God chose to bless me

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1115301030623941662005-05-05T21:50:00.000+08:002005-05-11T21:36:29.733+08:00

Emo KidYou are 28% Rational, 14% Extroverted, 28% Brutal, and 42% Arrogant. You are the Emo Kid, best described as a quiet pussy! You tend to be an intuitive rather than a logical thinker, meaning you rely more on your feelings than your thoughts. Not only that, but you are introverted, gentle, and rather humble. You embody all the traits of the perfect emo kid. You are a push-over,

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1114959593709744292005-05-01T22:29:00.000+08:002005-05-02T12:32:36.693+08:00

"...many of us, when Christ has enabled us to overcome one or two sins that were an obvious nuisance, are inclined to feel...that we are now good enough. He has done all we wanted Him to do, and we should be obliged if He would now leave us alone. As we say 'I never expected to be a saint, I only wanted to be a decent ordinary chap.'...But this is the fatal mistake. Of course we never wanted, and

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1113731052183418052005-04-17T17:18:00.000+08:002005-04-17T17:44:12.186+08:00

I've been learning about what it's like to have to depend on God lately and to rejoice in Him. Actually, I think this is what it's going to be like for the rest of my life--learning to depend on Him more and more. But lately it's been more acute, I guess. I have my humanities scholarship interview tomorrow. That's when they decide if I get $2000 and a remission of my school fees. It's just the

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1113119159984738642005-04-10T15:27:00.000+08:002005-04-10T15:45:59.986+08:00

I don't really know how the week went. I mean, I made it a point to be joyful and I was at certain points (I think. I mean, being joyful is sort of had to define so you're never really sure if you're actually joyful or not). I discovered what it meant to praise God with songs and how that helps. It was a good week; I'm glad I'm not scared of asking questions during econs class anymore. But

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1112620971155759252005-04-04T21:16:00.000+08:002005-04-04T21:22:51.156+08:00

The Mission: To be joyful in the Lord always Status: Needing God's strength. To Be Completed: By the time I die. Okay, fine. This week. Success? Check back with me next week.

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1112273171562707842005-03-31T20:31:00.000+08:002005-03-31T20:46:11.563+08:00

I'M DONE! After 2 weeks of research, 6 hours of staring at a computer screen spread over three days and typing and editing and typing some more, countless hours spent in the library photocopying over a hundred pages and killing whole trees as a result, I HAVE FINISHED MY HISTORY ESSAY. Okay, it's not the best essay in the world but it's possibly the essay I've spent the most time on in my life,

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1111810373656107832005-03-26T11:37:00.000+08:002005-03-26T12:12:53.663+08:00

Yay! This house believes that Myanmar should be allowed to chair ASEAN in 2006! a14 beat s73 2-1 to clinch the Hwa Chong inter-CT debate 2005. YEAHHH. Meanwhile, I embarrassed myself in front of Burge and Perry by saying something completely contradictory to what Kai Siong had said before me (according to Lucas, at least) but hey, at least I earned a compliment from some s73 guy. According to him

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1111408342541031112005-03-21T20:13:00.000+08:002005-03-21T20:32:22.546+08:00

Jac's feeling strangely light today. Maybe it's because she just had ballet class and even though her ballet exam's in two days' time and she can't really developpe that well it was just fun dancing and feeling like someone different. Maybe it's because she just got her PC test back on Plath's 'Tulips' and did much better than expected (A- :)). Maybe it's because today was different.

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1111216591735343372005-03-19T14:55:00.000+08:002005-03-19T15:16:31.736+08:00

It's been a welcome week of rest. It's nice to be able to wake up at 8 or 9 am in the morning instead of the ungodly hour of 6 AM every day and to have the whole day stretched out in front of you, just waiting. For some strange reason it hasn't been an enjoyable week, though. There have been quite a lot of struggles, which was actually quite unexpected. I guess that just shows that it's not

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1110113674799255882005-03-06T20:21:00.000+08:002005-03-06T20:55:29.406+08:00

It's hard to imagine that about five days ago I was estatic about my O'Level results--so thankful, so relieved, so triumphant. It's funny how life works, because the past few days have been days fraught with worry and insecurity. To tell you the truth, nothing much has happened outside of my mind. I told myself I wouldn't worry for the forty days before Lent (and hopefully after that), but this

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1109674638869792242005-03-01T18:20:00.000+08:002005-03-01T19:45:52.986+08:00

Just in case you think I'm this big blubberbut who cries at the drop of a hat (actually, sometimes I think I am). It was the tension. The tension, I tell you, mounting and mounting until it became unbearable. I mean, honestly! While everyone had been going on about how nervous and worried they were the friday before results came out I thought I had everything under control. And I did have

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1109172763094870062005-02-23T23:13:00.000+08:002005-02-24T20:57:00.966+08:00

This is one of the rare times when you see Jac grumpy. Normally I don't let people see me grumpy by it's 11:30 at night and I'm too grumpy to care. So there. :P School has been all right. I've had three tests over the past three days and haven't learnt much because most of our periods have been occupied with the tests. I'm looking forward to history tomorrow; I like history. I doubt Miles has

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1108222295465817912005-02-12T23:07:00.000+08:002005-02-12T23:31:35.466+08:00

What was I thinking, posting such a horrible poem? I apologise. I know I haven't been blogging for a while. I guess it's due partly because I've been pretty busy and partly because I don't have anything to say. No, correct that. I have plenty of things to say but nothing really constructive and I do try not to make this blog something just full of empty ramblings. I actually don't have anything

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1107354805702103882005-02-02T22:18:00.000+08:002005-02-03T17:57:37.706+08:00

As she slips silently past Future scholars, perky cheerleaders, Down the darkened passage She wonders If she will ever find her place. Visions, and opinions, And questionsquestionsquestions Stuck to her throat Making her choke-- No sound ever comes out. What marks are left to make When there's no space in the ground? Can timid voices be heard Underneath the loud crowd? Please slow

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1106485723741488482005-01-23T20:52:00.000+08:002005-03-19T14:53:32.863+08:00

Before the world sweeps you away... Stop. Look back, turn around, search. Search for the God and the love you once knew. Lift your eyes up to look from above the encircling darkness That poisons the hearts and minds of the world.

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1106479066600933752005-01-23T19:15:00.000+08:002005-01-27T18:28:24.026+08:00

Just to keep you occupied while I dive into another week of school: You scored as Remus Lupin. You are a wise and caring wizard and a good, loyal friend to boot. However sometimes in an effort to be liked by others you can let things slide by, which ordinarily you would protest about.Remus Lupin75%Ron Weasley70%Severus Snape70%Hermione Granger70%Ginny Weasley65%Sirius Black60%Albus

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1105754642132912762005-01-15T09:32:00.000+08:002005-01-15T10:04:02.133+08:00

I'm so sorry for the really confusing previous entry. At that point of time I felt so messed up--I don't think my thought process was really working very systematically. I feel better now that I've figured out a system for my note-taking in school (yes, Jac is very strange). I don't blame you for not knowing what on earth was talking about--no, not that. I think you can understand what I'm going

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1105609942862993472005-01-13T16:50:00.000+08:002005-01-13T17:52:22.863+08:00

I never realised how big and unfriendly the world is until I stepped into JC. Having been 'protected' by cute pink-and-white walls for the past 10 years, I got a rude shock once these walls disappeared. There are times in your life when you have to grow, and often, these times occur when you're out of your comfort zone. This week, I have been unceremoniously plucked out from my small hidey-hole

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1105282763709239792005-01-09T22:51:00.000+08:002005-01-10T17:42:25.093+08:00

Two things: 1. When they mean world wide web, they really mean world wide web. The farthest the East is from the West is right next to West. 2. I have been challenged to walk more intimately with my God and to know Him and delight in Him as I never have before. It is a daunting task, but what encourages me in His promise: "Draw close to Me and I will draw close to you." For bed I depart, to

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1105156372038415102005-01-08T11:43:00.000+08:002005-01-08T11:55:51.676+08:00

"So, what's the book about?" he asks after a moment's silence. She pauses for just a fraction of a second as she contemplates how to begin. "It's about a man who can time travel...and his wife. And whenever he travels to another time he goes naked." His brows furrow as he tries to absorb what he has just been told. "There must be two of him at the same time, then, right?" She considers that.

jacnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5622865.post-1105081378502481752005-01-07T14:53:00.000+08:002005-01-07T15:02:58.503+08:00

Sleeeepy... Medicine is making me drowsy (yes, i'm sick again) but I can't get to sleep because my nose is blocked up and every time I try to breathe through my mouth my mouth dries up and I need to get a glass of water. This happens approximately every 5 minutes, ensuring I never manage to fully doze off to sleep. Thanks to this flu/fever/cold/whatever, I have missed my orientation week. Humph

jacnoreply@blogger.com0